As I Lay Dying

The Atlantic, April 2015

Two doctors say it’s far too hard for terminal patients to donate their organs.  This is a thoughtful article about organ transplantation. “When organ donation works, families view it as a positive end to a tragedy,” but our regulations do not facilitate the process.  As I Lay Dying, written by two transplant surgeons from the University of Wisconsin, gives many  insights.

The End

“The End [is a series of occasional articles in the NY Times that] features essays by people who work in fields dealing with death and dying, like medicine, ethics and religion, as well as personal essays by those who have experienced the death of a loved one.”  Many of these pieces are moving and important.

A Pioneer for Death With Dignity

Barbara Coombs Lee is the president of Compassion and Choices, the leading nonprofit organization committed to helping everyone have the best death possible.  In a March 18^th, NT Times 2015 essay, she writes about Frank Roberts, “A Pioneer for Death With Dignity:”

More than two decades before Brittany Maynard’s public advocacy for death with dignity inspired lawmakers in Washington, D.C., and at least 16 states to introduce legislation authorizing the medical practice of aid in dying for the terminally ill, Senator Frank Roberts of Oregon sponsored one of the nation’s first death-with-dignity bills.

Had he lived longer, Frank might have been able to benefit from Oregon’s becoming a state that allowed death with dignity. But he died too soon.

 

photo from the Times article

The Trouble Wiith Advanced Directives

This very useful article is worth reading closely.  Paula Span is one of the most lucid and important writers about aging.  She is a regular contributor to "The New Old Age Blog."

NY Times, March 17, 2015 Trouble With Advanced Directives, by Paula Span

"People who aren’t sick or frail, but have strong feelings about what should happen when they are, can’t rely on a POLST or an advance directive alone.

"What they really need, experts say, is an ongoing series of conversations with the relatives or friends who will direct their care when they no longer can. In a crisis, doctors will turn to those people — more than to any document — to learn what the patient wants.

About My Mother

Marla Kissing Mommy

Yesterday was the anniversary of my mom's death. On that day back in 2006, in the afternoon, my mom took her last breath, in her own bed, just as she had wanted, just as it should be. She was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia one year after my dad died. It was terminal.

I remember when I went to say the mourner's prayer for 11 months at synagogue. I met so many people in the same situation. They were of great comfort to me. This daily prayer and those people there helped me get out of bed every morning. It was there that I met one of my now dearest friends, out of my tragedy...

Here is page with a link to the whole essay.

Their Dying Wishes

by Ann Neumann:
I met Mr. C. because he was dying and his wife needed someone to sit with him Saturday nights while she attended Mass. I was a relatively new hospice volunteer, not long out of training, and Mr. C. was my first assignment with a patient at home, rather than in a hospital or health care facility...

Their Dying Wishes is a moving piece by a hospice volunteer.  It's part of a series in the NY Times called "The End" that "features essays by people who work in fields dealing with death and dying, like medicine, ethics and religion, as well as personal essays by those who have experienced the death of a loved one."

Finding Joy in My Father’s Death

Image from Times essay

Ann Patchett’s essay about her father’s last years and his death from a Parkinsons-like disorder is honest, moving and helpful. It reminds me in some ways of Katy Butler's book, Knocking on Heaven's Door.

“My father died last month at 83 when my sister and I were on the plane, coming out to say goodbye for what felt like the 57th time. There was a message on my phone from my husband when we landed. What I felt when I heard the news was joy.”

NY Times Patchett Essay.